the confidence cure

Creating the confidence habit for women
who are done feeling, acting and speaking small


It can't have escaped your attention that we are in the middle of of a change in the tide.

The gender pay gap being exposed for all to see, books by the leading women in business like Sheryl Sandberg and Ariana Huffington talking about the paradigm shift in the way we view and are viewed at work.  Yes, even a female Doctor Who ;-)

Yes, women have historically been paid less than men, the loss of female talent at all levels of all professional careers in causing consternation and change; it's women's drive to create whole lives including friends, family, children and caring for others that drives the ever increasing moves to flexible working, hot design, remote working, compressed hours even portfolio careers and gig economy jobs.

We are driving the future.  Creating it in our own vision.


Of course.

You and I both know that we are fearful, scared, troubled.

We think that we don't know enough, aren't enough, don't deserve more.  We barely even look to our desires and as for our needs, well we don't act upon them yet expect everyone else to somehow know about them.

Anecdotally, I have seen troves of women leaving law because the long hours, work hard play harder culture doesn't appeal.  The pushing and striving is exhausting and the more deeply empathetic you are, the more you desire to have a life beyond on simple facet of who you are, the quicker it burns you out.

As women we consistently under-value ourselves.  We deflect compliments and positive feedback and cling to the one negative, real or perceived, that we can find in the pile.

We talk so often about how we are 'lucky' or 'blessed',rather than acknowledging the hard work and sacrifices that we make.

As women we automatically defer to the opinions of others, particularly male colleagues.  We over-value the expertise, experience and actions of those around us whilst minimising our own impact in the world.

By lacking confidence we actively sabotage our own success and ensure that we do not reach our highest potential.

Five years ago I received some of the most kind-yet-damning criticism from my boss; 'the thing about you Leah is you snatch defeat from the jaws of victory'.

Within sight of the victory line I would fall apart.

Who was I to achieve this?
Who was I to have this result?
Who was I to talk on the radio as an expert in front of millions of people?
Who was I to work a single job and be paid a good and reasonable wage for it?

Women don't apply for jobs unless they can comfortably accomplish 90% of the job description.  Men typically apply when they can accomplish 40-50% of it.

Men initiate salary discussions four times as often as women and, when women do negotiate, they ask for 30% less than men*

Female students expect to earn 20% less than their male student counterparts, after graduation**

Men consistently overestimate their results and women consistently underestimate their results, despite the results being broadly the same***

I can go on and on and on.

You and I both know that your confidence is shaky at best, non-existent at worst.  That you talk yourself down, struggle to believe in yourself the way you do your partner or friends or children.

You defer to the views of others, worry about the outcome almost constantly, struggle with the concept that you can BE more, DO more, HAVE more.

The same old narrative comes up time and time again.

Frankly, I'm pissed off even writing this.  I want to grab you and shake you and tell you how brilliant you are, instead of the lucky so far, waiting for the other shoe to drop, who, me? that you seem to think that you are.

I'm sick to death of seeing women keep themselves in these tiny little boxes because they don't think they should, don't think they can, don't think that they ought to (I might appear cocky after all).

Confidence is the disease.
Confidence is the cure.

Developing your self confidence and your ability to create real, sustainable self confidence will:

  • Improve your positive outlook;
  • Creating positive results;
  • Allowing you to take those results on board
  • Believe that you can create more
  • And go about creating more.

It's a never ending, completely perfect loop of biofeedback.

The more confident you become, the better your results, the better you feel and the more confident you become in achieving those results again.

So what is the confidence cure?

This is a 25 day programme addressing the key factors that undermine your confidence, prevent you from building authentic confidence and comfortably predicting success.

This is a group programme with daily short content.  Over the course of 25 days we are going to create confidence as a habit (it takes a minimum 21 days to create a habit).

What will we do?

Within a live private Facebook forum you will receive daily training to complete, together with two live group QnA sessions to pick up on gaps, get specific feedback and responses and get the support and kick up the ass that you need.

What do we cover?

(this is just a sample, I know that there will be more that will emerge and download throughout the course of our time together - the likelihood is that this will be MORE than 25 days, but that is where we're starting!)

  1. Your definition of confidence and MY definition of confidence
  2. Checking your factory settings (before life ground you down)
  3. Dealing with knocks and bumps in transit (the thoughts and events that you've picked up and dinged your confidence with)
  4. The different aspects of confidence you need to know;
  5. Markers of confidence and the biofeedback loop;
  6. Creating the new confident you (we will spend an entire 10 days on this alone - it can take a while to reprogrammed and reboot a computer, same with a human being).

When do we start?

Officially 3rd August but pre-work live training will start from 25th July 2017.







*Linda Babcock, Women Don't Ask
**Marilyn Davidson, Manchester Business School
*** Brenda Major, University of California