Over the past 24 hours I have gone in depth into my vision of the next level of Searching for Serenity and of my own life.
I talk all the time about getting clear on your goals, your motivations and inspirations, getting clear on what you want to achieve and then breaking it down to get there. I firmly believe that a woman without a goal is at the mercy of every person around her.
Yet, there I was. Nervous, hesitant to speak up, feeling a little bit directionless and aimless. Knowing that there was so much more to do and yet not really knowing where to start.
Today I got involved in something completely unexpected. In the course of supporting someone in my network who very bravely shared that she had also experienced sexual assault and harassment, I became drawn into a dispute.
I say drawn in because, aside from feeling taken aback and a little shocked, I didn't really get angry or upset. For a redheaded Leo former lawyer who used to frequently find people on the internet who were 'wrong' and try to put them straight, this was a huge achievement.... yay me!
We all know people who seem to effortlessly, with total fun and flow and barely a hint of work, seem to get *exactly* what it is that they want in life.
They have the gorgeous apartment and instagram feed filled with perfect pictures of beautiful holidays or the sweet supportive boyfriend who happens to earn a bomb or the two perfectly behaved angelic children who never write on the walls in permanent marker...
It took me until 3pm today to realise that it was Friday the 13th.
I've looked at my phone dozens of times, had an appointment booked in for today, but it took me until 3pm to realise that it was Friday the 13th.
I kid you not, in law I almost always took Friday the 13th off work. I am not exceptionally superstitious and I regard every bit of woo-woo through a lens of psychology and experience, but Friday the 13th? Yeesh.
Today is World Mental Health Day, and I will be sharing more of my story this evening (check out the PS at the bottom of this blog for more details).
But right now, this is about you.
I know that you've gotten so caught up in everything you need to do, everything you need to achieve, everything that hasn't been done yet, all the reasons for which you feel that you are a failure.
All the excuses you need to beat yourself up.