Why do so many managers believe that burnout isn’t a problem, whilst their staff scream at me privately that it is? That can all come down to two little words: empathy gap.
Most of us work our way up a ladder and as we start to reach the top rungs, we believe that although we have climbed, we are also grounded, measured and understand other people, because we have been there. We all started on the ground after all.
What very few understand well is that, the higher you climb, the more likely it is that the ground has changed since you were last on it. The seasons have changed or the landscape has changed. As a result, the experience of those on the ground may well be completely different from how you experienced it.
Click here to keep reading
At work, I used to call myself the 'emotional support puppy'.
It was a name I laughingly applied to myself because, no matter where I went or what I did a few simple things were true.
People would come to me for support.
They would tell me the things that they had been scared to tell anyone else.
They would, directly or indirectly, ask for my help to fix their problems.
Pretty brilliant considering I was lawyer, this is exactly what you want, right?
Except, it wasn't just my clients. It was kind of everyone around me.
And the problem was, I had boundaries built of sand.
This one is going to be rough, it’s not going to be a love and light, help and support kind of blog. Because I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but it’s kind of a mess right now.
Yet, even whilst your safety is shaken you have a choice.
You can give in to the fear, panic, worry, exhaustion and let it completely consume you, blaming groups, getting divisive, getting grabby over resources and indulging in some of the most basic bad behaviours going.
Or you can guard your goddamn mind and stop getting sucked into the victim role.
Here’s what I know. Right now, you’re going to be waiting a long damn time to be rescued. So you’re going to have to do it yourself.
Do I mean adopt a stiff upper lip, pretend everything is ok, keep calm and carry on?
Fuck no, I do not.
Click here to keep reading
Problem fixers are essentially control freaks and right now, every one of us has been thrown for a loop. It’s rare to be confronted with something that you cannot control and changes so rapidly. Usually we have plans, we have timelines, we have key dates. Even under the most difficult of circumstances there is always a precedent to look back to, there are always people who have been through what we are about to go through, even as our individuality makes it unique.
Click here to keep reading
For more than four years now, my emails have been signed off with this single phrase; ‘take care of yourself’. Initially it replaced ‘yours faithfully’ and ‘kind regards’ as a way to be more personable, more friendly, less ‘professional’ (or I suppose, emotionally distant). It was a phrase that made me smile because, at the heart of it, every email I send is about helping people to take greater care of themselves, so why not leave it at the end of those messages?
How do we remember to take care of ourselves in a time of crisis, any crisis really, but especially right now. How do we do that when everything we’re doing seems so counter-intuitive; pulling away from people physically, washing our hands until they bleed (my knuckle literally split as I was typing this, hello eczema my old friend).
Why is taking care of yourself important? It’s not just about not getting sick.
Click here to keep reading
